You Have Four Boys?: June 2012

Oh what a year it has been. The first birthday of any child is a big milestone and we have always celebrated with a big party for our babies. Rob and I want to share the with all our friends and family the little person who is starting to show personality and who is well on their way to becoming the little person they will be. They change so much in that first year and it has gone by so fast for us.

I have learned so much this year from our twins.  Here are several that jump out at me right now:

1. Let people help you if they offer - I am way to self conscience about letting people help me. I guess I feel like if I let people help me then I am doing something wrong in the first place to need the help. Crazy right? I think I am not alone in this though because how many times have you told someone you are "just fine" when you weren't? I had to accept help and the only thing that broke through my hangups were people just showing up and doing things for me. I mean like folding a load of laundry that gasp! had my underwear in it! Wait, stop, don't tell the world I wear underwear! Other things I can think of are: accepting donor milk for the babies when I could not make enough, letting people carry one of the babies for me because I am not the hulk and carrying two car seats is hard; letting people watch my big boys when I could not play with them. When people offer to help you they are doing what Jesus through the bible has asked us to do. By turning them down, you are stopping them from serving!
2. It is okay to ask for help - seriously sometimes you have to ask for help. I did not ask for enough help after the twins were born. Again, it was a pride thing and not wanting to bother anyone with my problems.  So six months goes by and I have a massive gallbladder attack while home alone with the kids. I could barely dial the phone I was in so much pain and Robert was 45 minutes away. I had to call someone right away and lo and behold she came, just like that all I had to do was ask!  After removing my gallbladder, my surgeon told me I could not lift anything for two weeks. I laughed at him and reminded him I had six month old twins and he reminded me that if I ripped my stitches I would have to undergo "open" surgery which would require six weeks of no lifting.  So, I was forced to call in the cavalry (i.e. our awesome church family) and have people in my house lifting babies for me and gasp! folding my underwear again. Again, God gave us the gift of people who love us and we should ask them for help and give them the opportunity to serve!
3. There is no "right"way to do things - I am what I would consider a crunchy mom. I co-sleep with my babies, I breastfeed until we (meaning me and the baby) decide to stop and I have what I call free range babies, meaning they are free to explore in a safe environment.   I was so looking forward to my third child. I daydreamed about how easy this baby would be (before we knew it was number three AND four). I could wear the baby in the sling while Cooper and I did school, we could still get out with minimal effort, and I had so much more confidence in myself as a mother. Now I just laugh and laugh at that stupid girl.
We found out about the twins when I was 20 weeks along and that is pretty late these days. Suddenly I did not know how to be a mom anymore. How do you breastfeed two babies? How do you wear them in a sling? How were we going to sleep? All the things I did as a mom were suddenly up in the air. Breastfeeding did not go as planned. The babies would not latch and I did not make enough milk. After two months of pumping the babies finally started latching but I still had supply problems. I had to supplement with formula, which I had never had to use before. Bottles were a new world to me as well. Oh and there was no sleep/nursing in bed while the big boys watched a movie either. I did not sleep more than two hours straight for six months. I had to pump around the clock in the beginning to sustain my milk and the twins did not sleep through the night until they were six months old. Yes, I learned to be a different kind of mom and I am much less judgmental about decision people make regarding their kids. I still believe in all my crunchy goodness, I just had to learn to do things another way.
4. My husband is the most amazing man in the world. Sorry gals, I got the best one. Rob has always been a great dad and very supportive of all my choices regarding child rearing. Breastfeeding pretty much meant the baby was mine until they turned 1 and he could play with them. I mean besides changing diapers and bath time, and being my "water boy" there was not a lot for him to do with the actual baby while they are infants. Well, the twins changed all that. Suddenly, instead of bringing the babies to me to eat, there were bottles to wash and babies to feed and change and bathe and he was front and center for all of that. Oh and there was our first two boys who he had to be mom and dad too for at least the first three months. My husband is a blessing from God and a true partner in helping me raise our family.

Here's a great big thank you to everyone who helped us this last year.!

Okay, enough of all that serious stuff how about some pictures!!